I Break My Own Heart
Alex Wilson
Description
A raw and emotionally charged pop-rock anthem about self-sabotage and the struggle to accept a healthy relationship. Alex Wilson's "I Break My Own Heart" explores the internal conflict of someone who pushes away love out of fear of vulnerability, masking their insecurities with destructive behavior. The song contrasts intimate, almost fragile verses with explosive, cathartic choruses, mirroring the protagonist's volatile emotional state.
Lyrics
[Verse 1] My therapist just called me "healing" I almost think she might be right I felt okay for like a weekend But then I stayed up late last night I read a text from 2023 Lookin' for a sign you’d get sick of me You didn't, so I guess I’ll have to do it [Pre-Chorus] You're drawing circles on my palm The car is warm, the song is low It's all so good, it's all so calm And that’s the signal, time to go I get the itch to press the button The one that’s painted "self-destruct" in red It’s not you, it’s just the voice inside my head [Chorus] 'Cause I break my own heart better than you ever could I ruin something perfect just to see if I would I’m the queen of sabotage, I’m the problem, I’m the proof I break my own heart, so I’ll never lose to you (Yeah) It's a stupid kind of art I break my own heart [Verse 2] I've got your hoodie on my floor I trace the college logo with my shoe I know you'd meet me at the door With open arms, if I just asked you to But you're too patient, you're too kind It makes me wanna lose my mind You’re not the one who’s gonna make this hard So I’ll just play the "bad guy" card [Pre-Chorus] I’ll start a fight about your tone Or say I really need to be alone I get the itch to press the button The one that’s painted "self-destruct" in red It’s not you, it’s just the voice inside my head [Chorus] 'Cause I break my own heart better than you ever could I ruin something perfect just to see if I would I’m the queen of sabotage, I’m the problem, I’m the proof I break my own heart, so I’ll never lose to you (Yeah) It's a stupid kind of art I break my own heart [Bridge] (Music drops: half-time, clean guitar and bass groove) I’m good at being 19 and stupid I’m good at being 21 and a mess I’m good at playing the victim, I’m good at playing the fool (Vocals start to build, drums swell) But God, I'm so bad at being good to you! [Down-Chorus] (Music explodes) I break my own heart, I'm the only one I blame I light the perfect candle just to spit on the flame I'm the queen of sabotage, I’m the problem, I’m the proof [Final Chorus] I break my own heart better than you ever could! I ruin something perfect just because I knew I would! Yeah, I’m the queen of sabotage, I’m the problem, I’m the proof! I break my own heart, so I’ll never lose to you! (Yeah) It's a stupid, ugly art! I break my own heart [Outro] (Guitars feeding back) (Spoken, whisper) I'm sorry, I... I just... I do this every time.